Friday, November 4, 2011

Hookers, Hotels, and Cigarettes...

You all know I'm a busy actress (Praise the Lord!) living in the O.C. I will get an apt. in L.A. but right now I have two boys in high school and a husband who owns a business out here so it's tough! Until that day comes, I stay in hotels, which leads me to my story.

After one of my last blogs I decided to look for a new acting coach, so I booked an audit for Thursday night in Hollywood a week ago. Monday, I get a notice that I have rehearsal for my Pilot at 8am the next morning in Northridge. Ugh! Most classes don't get out until @11pm and I was not going to drive all the way home just to get up at 3am to go back. Sooo, I went on priceline (thank you William Shatner) and booked a hotel. It looked nice on the Internet and the description said it even had a bar - whoo hoo! Martini here I come! When I get there I discover the bar is a Dennys. Really??? Can you say PRINCESS! Well, thank goodness for NAV, I found Pavilion's, bought some cheese, salami and a bottle of J.Lohr and went back to the hotel. Yay, the guy at the front desk had a corkscrew!

It's hard to find parking on the street, but at the Hotel? Come on! I drove around two times and see this "COUPLE" leaving, yay!

OMG he gets out of the car, comes over to me and tries to pick me up. REALLY?? Now, I wear a rock as big as Gibraltar that says MARRIED, MARRIED, MARRIED! Can he not see that? Yay, he gets back into his car and pulls away. Whew! I pull in the spot and all of a sudden he comes knocking at my window and scares the livin' daylights out of me! He starts in again, ugh! I said thank you, but what about your girlfriend? He said, "Oh she's not my girlfriend, she's my sister." Ok, wait a minute, she was as white as snow, long blond hair and well folks, he was very obvisouly African American. Related??? (Maybe?) He insisted on me giving him my number. So, I did. What was I going to do? I was by myself, 11pm, scared to death, (SPOILED, LOL) and who the heck knows as persistant as he was, what he would've done if he found out I gave him a fake number.
I go to my room and lo and behold who is in the room next to me. THEM! OMG! I thought they were leaving! What to do?? PRAY! I said, "Hi guys, gotta study my script, night, night and closed the door." I opened my wine, poured myself a huge glass (plastic, oh well) and had a bite to eat. So about 11:30 I go outside to have a cigarette (Yes, I smoke. HBO told me I was too heavy, gotta lose weight somehow - can you say constant diet!) and I see this girl standing outside their room, hmm! I went outside (all non smoking rooms) checked to see if my car was okay and went back inside. Alright it's about 1:00AM now, I've studied my script, washed my face, finished my wine (not the whole bottle, lol) and decide to go out and have 1 last cig before bed. Guess who comes out to join me? Blondie! Minnie, minnie dress, big tattoo on her not so skinny leg, big bling pumps and a giant bling belt. Hooker? Drug dealer? Threesome? UGH! We start talking and she tells me she doesn't know who that guy was and that he was following her around. REALLY, do I look stupid? I saw her get into his car, then into the room together, did she forget? What about the other girl? What did I get myself into?? I never told her he said she was his sister, I felt like I needed to leave that one alone. I told her why I was there, then asked her why she was there when she lived just down the street. She said because she wanted to party. OOOOhhhh okay, hmm. I said well, "I've got to get my beauty rest (fearing HE might show up again and want me to join in)." Got in my room and locked that door tight! Slept with my clothes on for fear someone might come a knockin'. PAAARRRAAANNOOOIIDDD. Got an okay nights sleep (good bed at least) and high tailed it out of there for my rehearsal.

Every day is a learning experience for me and an adventure. At least I can use these things for my character work.

Oh well, what's a girl to do?????

THINK HE'LL CALL???

The Auditon

Okay, now we all know the auditon process is supposed to be a fun and easy experience....right??
DEFINITION OF AUDITION:
1. A trial hearing given to a singer, actor or other performer to test suitability for employment.
2. A reading or other simplified rendering of theatrical work, performed before a potential backer, producer, etc.
3. Something that is HEARD.
Now, when we as actors have an audition, normally we get our sides in advance so we know what to expect. We do a character breakdown and memorize our lines. (Well, most of the time)
So, today, once again I get up at the crack of dawn to be at an "Audition" in Hollywood off of Cahuenga at 10am after driving all the way to Northridge last night (3 hours mind you----NOT COMPLAININ') last night for my table read for the Pilot I'm in. (Yay, I love my character!!) I finally get back home @ 11:30pm, make myself a cup of tea and go night, night. (Gotta get my beauty rest). I think to myself, this audition is going to be a piece of cake, all the CD wants me to do is fill out some paperwork and tell him in one minute who my favorite Actor is and why. Sooooo, I got this!! Meryl Streep and Johnny Depp...I mean who wouldn't love them??? Talented and well, come on..Johnny is sooooooo gorgeous!! I even printed up a picture of him so I could show the CD how gorgeous he really is, of course besides being talented..we mustn't forget that!
Well I finally get there and get myself prepared and walk in to the Studio. I say "HI", to the receptionist, (I always try to be kind) then I looked down on the desk. I saw a paper taped to it that says, "NO CHEATING ON TEST". I look around the room and see everyone with a clipboard. What??? The receptionist then hands me a clipboard with a paper attached to it and says, "No cheating, no asking your neighbor for answers and no checking your cell phone." "No, no", I said; "Wait a minute, I'm here for an audition not a test". She said, "All of you have to take a test". WHAT???? Soooo, I take the clipboard and sit down. What was I going to do, drive all the way back home??? Nope, I'm a trouper!
Well, of course I wasn't prepared so I didn't know the answers to half of the questions. I don't watch Gossip Girls (Shhh, don't tell anyone) I thought that show was for teenagers. I mean if I would've known, I would done my research, ugh!
So, I finish my test, go in the audition room and he says okay put your stuff here, I just need to take a few pic's of you and you can go. I said, "What, I don't I get to tell you about my favorite actors?". He said, "Not today". Really??? I was completely disheartened. So, he took a few headshots and said, "We're done". Wwweeeellllll, I insisted! I took my picture of Johnny out of my purse and said, "Well, I'm going to show you anyway". I showed him the picture and said, "How you could possibly not love this face, besides his talent, isn't he gorgeous?????". They just laughed.
What's a girl to do??
THINK I GOT THE PART???? LOL